I bet you're guilty of at least one of these. Which one?

1. Obsess about getting the details right. 

You've heard something like this: "I had the most exciting rafting trip ever. It was last August. No, it was July. No, it was June, the month after the basement flooded. No, it was the year before that...."

Unless you're testifying in court, don't quibble about details. Quibbling messes up your story's flow, and it puts your listeners to ZZ-zzz-zzz-sleep. We've all heard it, and now you'll catch yourself before you do it. 

2. Be a know-it-all. 

Eight friends were sailing off the island of Hawaii. They talked about where to go next. Should they head toward Kona, or go the other direction? Fred said, "There are NO good anchorages around Kona. The snorkeling stinks." He said it so stubbornly and authoritatively that no one dared contradict him -- not the boat's captain nor the owner, not even Gaelyn, another licensed Coast Guard captain who had happily anchored and snorkeled in several spots near Kona. The know-it-all ended the discussion.  

Fortunately, Fred had a change of heart. Or perhaps it was an opening of his mind. The next morning he took Gaelyn aside. "You've sailed around here. What's your experience?" Just like that <snap your fingers> the conversation resumed. 

Send a copy of this article to your favorite know-it-all. 

3. Talk about someone your talk buddy hasn't heard of. 

We've gotta curb our desire to talk about our friends (or worse, friends of friends). Frankly, unless it's a terrific, outstanding, edge-of-your-seat story, it's BORing. Here's an example: 

"Oh, you're a writer? My friend Susan has written seven novels set on the south coast of Ikkelsfahrt. There's this cute dog, see...."

<Yawn....>

What I'd rather hear is "Oh, you're a writer? My friend Susan is a writer, too. She could give you excellent tips on marketing your book. Would you be interested in getting in touch?" 

Before launching into your story, ask yourself: Is this information relevant or useful to my listener?

Don't kill a conversation in its tracks. Download "15 Fun and Original Ice Breakers & Conversation Questions for Parties, Dates, and Hanging Out With Friends." You'll get my free newsletter, too. Go to http://www.QueenOfConversation.com/15-Sure-Fire-Conversation-Starters.html

©Tracey E. Bennett, The Queen of Conversation

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